If I could save time in a bottle... that would be one heavy bottle.

Friday, April 07, 2006

God of wha?

One of my favorite songs is the Crowder duo of "I need words/God of Wrath." Tangentially, that's a major reason I love Crowder... he's willing to delve into areas of theology that many people fear to tread. Well done sir... thank you.

More to my point though, I love the song because of the reality of the two messages right next to each other...

I need words...
I need language...
I need a voice...
I need a song to sing you, that I've yet to find.
I need you...
To be here now

Utter dependance. The voice of humility cries helpless in the midst of all the things that would push and pull us and demand our attention. In the face of God, we must sing and speak and worship, or just fall silent, but the reality is that any song I could come up with is empty without His words... larger than sky and life and the longing inside of me.

God of wrath
God of love
God of Earth
God above
God of hope
God of peace...
All I am for you...

And still, as we strive to reach, touch, and worship the One... the first thing we must sometimes come to terms with is that He is, from time to time, a God of Wrath. That doesn't compromise His character or His love or Peace or Hope... in fact it harmonizes with it, creating something beautiful and deeper that my language could express. It's in the face of His wrath that my words fall most painfully short... because I am at once in the face of a wrath that I could never contend with... and at the same time held in the strong arm of one who saves completely.

This morning, I need words. An 18 year old boy whose parents go to my church, wrapped his truck around a tree and died. I know things like this happen. My theology will hold that because of the fallenness of man and the brokenness of the world, good people die and young people die and parents must bury their children, even though it seems to rage against the very fabric of fairness. I had to talk to that mother this morning, and all I could pray was, "God, I don't have words to say that will make sense. God, I fear being trite and canned. I fear that I'll try to diminish the reality of pain because my broken perspective thinks that it will somehow diminish you."

God, my view of you is too small. The richness of who you are becomes more colorful in the face of tragedy, because I find that you are bigger than even tragedy. Father, save me from ever being trite. Save me from ever trying to rescue someone from what you're leading them through. I don't understand, so I need words.

Thank you, Mr. Crowder for speaking the dangerous truth about our very large Creator. May He forever smile upon you... His faithful bard.

2 comments:

Singleton said...

"God, I don't have words to say that will make sense. God, I fear being trite and canned. I fear that I'll try to diminish the reality of pain because my broken perspective thinks that it will somehow diminish you."

-I've learned a lot about this lately. Why do we push so hard to "get past" or be "okay with" these hard, painful things? Something I learned from a friend of mine is a good practice in my experience:
"If you've experienced loss, grieve; and grieve well."

Jason Powers said...

I know. I think "grieving well" is so important. It's almost like only the "positive" experiences are worth throwing ourselves into. I believe that there's an amazing truth found at the bottom of loss and pain. It's the truth that God is there too.

I find myself always coming to say or think that I'm not done with a situation until I'm "good with it."

Philip Yancey... Disappointment with God... thought provoking and interesting.

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As the self-proclaimed and happy-to-meet-you Small Group zealot at River City Community Church, my hope is that this page will make you laugh, learn, grow, smile, and most of all cherish the role you’ve been given to play in the Family. I believe Small Group leadership is the most strategic role in the local Church.